The Square Root of One

Shuffle Repeat. Forever.

2012-03-07T20:46:00.000-08:00

I'm thinking back to the days before music came in readily available online doodads, downloaded from whatsit sites using Gigs, or whatever.

I used to know every word to every song on Weird Al's Greatest Hits Volume 2. Don't laugh, it was the first CD I ever owned, and I listened to it a thousand million times. The words and melodies were ingrained into my subconscious, and when provided with the most subtle of cues, I could burst into song if the need should arise. When I had enough cash on me to buy my own CDs, I listened to them constantly, to the point of burning holes clear through the discs. I couldn't afford a ton at a time, so usually there were 3 or 4 in rotation. When they died, I would get new ones.

And I learned all of those songs too. I could recite the lyrics from any song at any time. I could sing the lyrics to from one to the rhythm of another.

I also learned to appreciate music this way. I discerned quickly what I liked, and what I didn't. There was no time for messing about with bands and songs I didn't want to hear, or that I heard once and enjoyed, but didn't consider it a long term thing. I learned that I didn't like listening to sad music when I was sad, because it made me feel worse. I like happy music most of the time, and angry music some of the time. And when I listened to CDs, I could choose the tunes that best fit my mood.

Fast-forward to 2010, when I finally got an iPod, and I started throwing all kinds of music on there. A little farther forward, and I figured out what a torrent was. And now, I have hundreds of songs on a constant, unending loop playing in my car. It's probably playing right now, with no one listening to it, and no one noticing one way or another.

My appreciation for the finer things in music waned. It became background noise, a generally ignored soundtrack. Some of the songs are my personal favourites. Some were downloaded on a whim. People gave me other ones. Most of them, I don't even care about, and I skip right through looking for the gold. As I download more, the odds of me finding something I want to actually hear diminish. It's something like a 1 in 20 chance that I hear what I feel like at that particular moment. When I was buying actual physical CDs, my odds were 19 in 20.

I'm not lambasting digital media, or the ability to rip off the record industry at an alarming rate, and jacking up the price of actual physical CDs. I'm just saying it's changed the way I listen to my music. I suppose I could turn off shuffle, and take it off repeat. I could pick an album on my iPod and roll like that for a while. But it's already on shuffle. And the next tune will probably be good. Well, maybe the next.

And shuffle. And repeat.

New Title for a Book: "Do Not Disturb: I'm Reading, Ya Bastards!"

2012-03-05T20:06:00.000-08:00

Sometimes, when I'm sitting alone, on a park bench, or in a coffee shop, or the break room at work, or on a plane, train, automobile, or anywhere that it is possible to sit, I'm accosted by a very strange person.

This person feels that a book is just a harmless pastime. They're not wrong. I'm not studying for a class or anything. I'm not deeply engrossed in philosophically pondering the repercussions of cybernetic parts implanted onto a human body. But I'm trying to be.

I have the urge to go to the places that these people call homes and walk in on them watching TV or doing word searches, or whatever it is they do with their time, and I'll start talking to them about how those are things that I don't do. I'll say, "Yeah, I was never really into the TV-watching thing. I mean, I don't have the attention span for it. I was more into books." I'll continue on in this fashion until they see how I feel.

Equally obnoxious are the people that sit down across from you and wait with expectant eyes, like I'm about to break into song or something for their benefit. I'm afraid they're expecting my act of reading to be a little more exciting than it's actually going to be. But I feel no shame, no regret. Reading is a personal act, and I'm doing it for me. If they want me to read out loud to them, all they have to do is ask. But they're probably not going to understand what's going on, and I'm definitely not starting over.

In RE: the title of this blog post, I feel that a banner should be placed along the top edge of any book, both front and back cover, that says "Do Not Disturb." Maybe then people will start getting the idea.

Rebirth

2011-07-22T22:18:00.000-07:00

As I'm sure you are all NO DOUBT AWARE, DC Universe is launching a whole new shebang. They're starting fresh, from the top. The same old Justice League, but from the beginning. Superman is Superman, Batman is Batman, but they don't even know about each other yet. And all the women are sexed right the hell up.

I've got mixed feelings about this. My general dislike of change and my dear memories of the comics I've loved for so long tell me no, but my desire for creativity and interesting stories say yay! The issues that concern me function on two levels. One, the way the comics themselves are presented. Two, what the comics are saying about the new audience they're supposedly trying to appeal to.

To start on a positive note, gaining new readers is a wonderful endeavour, and comics are obviously re-asserting themselves as a form of entertainment, even if it's in the form of movies. So a new audience is a great idea. And as we all NO DOUBT KNOW, there is a lot of history in the DCU. These dudes have been around for 75 years, and have been having any number of strange adventures. They've been through no less than 3 multiverse shattering crises, not to mention the vast personal misfortunes that have befallen them. For a new reader, it can be daunting. I know, because that's exactly what happened to me when I was a new reader.

Do away with the crises, rebuild the relationships from the ground up, and any casual comic reader should be able to pick up what's being put down. This is a definite advantage. Also, some of comicdom's greatest creators are behind the new titles, and I'm sure they'll do the characters and their environments justice. I'm resistant to change, but I've been known to come around, after a while.

Also, Swamp Thing, John Constantine, Resurrection Man, and Shade the Changing Man are all kicking around in the new DC. I like these guys, so I'll probably like their comics. Their reappearance tells me that the people who were reading comics 20 or even 30 years ago are now writing them, taking the characters they've loved and throwing them back into the mix. And an informed writer is an entertaining writer.

Certain facts have been reset, certain changes have been made. Dick Grayson returns to his Nightwing days. Bruce Wayne is Batman. Tim Drake keeps on being Red Robin, although he has a big pair of goofy bird wings. Not sure how I feel about that one. And Damien Wayne, Bruce's murderous son, keeps being Robin. Batman and Robin are now a literal father-and-son team. I suppose it's about time for that. Some of these things, I can consider positive.

And now, my friends, the negatives.

Scantily clad superheroines have gotten scantily cladder. Starfire's boobs are definitely on display, and they weren't exactly hidden the first time around. Supergirl is looking pretty leggy, and Harley Quinn is a huge juggalo tramp. TRAMP! I saw a picture online, and it's what prompted this whole issue of Square Root. She doesn't look like a jester, just a whore. And this saddens me. I liked the old jester look.

A few other changes seem to have taken place. One of the covers for Detective Comics shows Batman tossing around some villains. And the Riddler has. A. QUESTION. MARK. MOHAWK. Sunuvabitch. He's the only one I objected to, but boy, did I object. Also, Superman. The photos I saw had him in a Superman T-shirt, with jeans and rugged-looking workboots. Eh? Wha? I don't follow. Is there no respect for tradition? No love for icons? Has everyone gone MAD?!

Sorry. That was an unacceptable reaction.

In conclusion, this is a bold and unprecedented move on DC's part, and I'm sure it'll keep them around for much much longer. The downside to this is that they changed my DC. I already liked it. Put it back. WHAT ABOUT MEEEE?

Re-emergence

2011-06-19T21:24:00.000-07:00

Howdy howdy howdy,

So I've decided it's time to become one of you unwashed blogging masses again, and since I don't have a website or any other way to post bizarre inanity on the world-wide-typin' box, I'm going back to the roots. The blog roots. Now for the tricky part. Coming up with something to say.

It has come to my attention that the reading of books has taken a substantial blow. Preaching to the choir, I know, since anyone reading this thing is liable to read anything, but my point stands. More than once I've been referred to as "a reader," with all the contempt and disgust placing a word in quotation marks can convey. Let me ask you this; have we really reached the point where people will call you a reader with the same tone of voice that they'll call you a pedophile?

I loves me some reading. I have what can be considered a decent library, I've got piles and piles of comics literally littering my room right now, and I just got one'a them fancy e-readers that's full of more books than you can shake a camel at, and I plan on plowing my way through them, just so I can make room for more. The reading of this material makes me feel better about myself, and for a number of reasons.

For one, I learn. I learn about writing, new methods and styles, things I enjoy and things that perhaps I don't enjoy so much. I learn about new ideas and about old ideas that have been discarded, thrown down into the dust and tromped all over, left to rot between the covers of this untapped resource called "book." And really, there's nothing wrong with reading a bad book. Every bit of information can be used to some degree of benefit, even if all you gain is the knowledge that maybe vampires aren't cool anymore.

It's also something to do. I don't watch Top Chef, Iron Chef (well sometimes, because it's just so INTENSE), Survivor, The Bachelor, the Amazing Race, A Shot at Love, Pleasure Island, House People, and on and on and on, mostly because I crave one thing above all others; stories. Television no longer has stories that I care about. Actually, it doesn't really have much for story as it stands. I agree that a group of people hanging out creates stories, but when it's real people, I just find it hard to care. I have real people around me all the damn time. Why should I watch some jackanapes parading around like there aren't 3 high-powered digital cameras recording their every move, giving testimonials about their actions and attempting to explain away things that everyone does anyway?

Movies used to be good. Remember that? You would take some time out of your afternoon and go on a high-flying adventure or a lighthearted romp through someone's silly misadventures. Now, you take your ENTIRE afternoon and go on a lumbering waste of time. These things are either way longer than they deserve to be--I'm looking at you, Transformers 2--or simply try too hard to be something they aren't. I can appreciate a stupid comedy about a man losing a government duck and the havoc he creates trying to get it back, but it doesn't have to be a heartfelt love letter to ducks, or a scathing commentary on the government, or a warning about mental instability. Sometimes, a poop joke is just a poop joke. Let it be.

I understand that this all has to do with the movie industry, and covering costs and whatnot. No one wants to pay 13 bucks for a movie, so the studios figure, "Maybe they just want more of it," and cram in an extra hour and a half of garbage that really has no need to be there. Well, I'll tell you something, I would rather watch a good hour and a half than a mediocre three hours. I don't think I'm alone in this. Hell, most times I would rather watch a good hour and a half than a good three hours. I still haven't rewatched The Dark Knight, because it's just so FRIGGIN' long. And we're talking about Batman here. BATMAN.

In any case, books take me on long, extended voyages down a two-way street, both into and out of my own mind. The words are there, but for them to become images, my brain's gotta do the heavy lifting. I take the turns of phrase, the similes and the analogies, and turn them into something visual, something tangible. Down the other lane, the things that I have to deal with in my everyday life can take a vacation in the backseat. They're still going to be there, but they can have a nap for a bit. Sometimes, the imagination has to fly.

Comics are their own special field of craziness, and I'm sure I could write a whole post about them, so I probably will, but later. There is time. There is always time.

I can't say I'm exactly where I started with this post, but I'm just returning to this blog thing. It'll take some getting used to. I guess my point is that reading is good for the brain and the body, and there's no reason not to do it. As a matter of fact, you probably should do it, to avoid the inevitable dumbing down of the world. Things are already stupid. Don't help that. Instead, help me. Financially.