Kaboom! Go buy a Trans-Am.

If you can't get ahold of a Trans-Am, get a Firebird. Also not possible? Then chop the lid off your car, put this CD in the music thing, and crank that bitch until the knob falls off. Drive really damn fast and listen to Heaviside's new album, "Wasted Generation."

This thing reminded me of what music should be. The bass is fuzzed, the drums are fast, and lead singer Mitchell's vocal range can be described as nothing less than bitchin'. Johno's guitar solos sound like they were born from the song, not written. They are fluid and melodic and beautiful, and right where they need to be. The rhythm section smashes it up, blending together like gasoline and orange juice, creating a fiery napalm ocean that the guitars and vocals ride over on surfboards of iron and leather and electricity. This is a band to be reckoned with. And they're damn well ready to reckon.

We're stuck in a world of over-produced pop garbage, with layer upon layer of sound hiding what little musical value there is to be gained, and we're selling every single twelve-year-old as the next big thing, when all they're doing is rehashing the stuff that's come before them, with more sex and more technological advancement. Heaviside decided to keep the sex, and cut way back on the technology. This thing sounds like it could have travelled in a flux-capacitor-powered El Camino from 1977, bringing with it chicks in tiny jean-shorts and fluorescent bikini tops, drinking Michelob Lite out of their own cleavage with brightly-coloured twisty-straws.

Heaviside's not trying to sell you on any heavy message. They don't bog their music down with deep metaphors and soul-altering questions. They shoot you with a party gun, and bring you back to life with a rock 'n' roll defibrillator.

I had a blast listening to this album. It's the first time in years where I sat down to specifically listen to music, and I couldn't be more happy that I did. I also totally wrote about this before, see? I could hear fingers sliding on strings and breaths being taken and sticks clicking and clacking around, and it made the experience all the better for it.

I've only seen these guys live once, but they put on a hell of a show. And they get awfully sweaty. If the band you're watching doesn't get sweaty, they aren't performing right. Demand a refund immediately.

My favourite song on the album was Aurora, followed closely by Eva. The rest was all badass too. Listen to it. Do it.

Here's the website. Check 'em out. They're pretty. http://heaviside.ca/.